There are many things I despise in office environments; chewed biros, filthy keyboards, promotional mouse-mats, sickly-looking houseplants, coffee mugs with mould in them, people… the list could go on for another couple of pages and I’d still continue to find more.
However no single item gets me more riled than the motivational poster. I find them offensive to my intelligence. Nothing speaks more loudly of a business lacking in imagination than a cheap clip-frame containing an A3 print of a dolphin, a sunset, or a salmon propelling itself up a waterfall. Whatever the cheesy stock-photography may be it is always surrounded by a black border and a single word in serif text, ‘Dream’ ‘Grow’ ‘Inspire’ or in the case of an office whose windows I frequently pass ‘Walk the Talk’. These are filled-out by some throwaway motivational phrase set below the headline.
These revolting pieces of tat have hung in so many offices around the world that their graphic-style has become as parodied as the ‘Keep calm and…’ posters. They are meaningless visual garbage purchased by the brain-dead twat whose sole responsibility is to place the office’s paperclip order. “Buy something nice for the wall of meeting-room six” the boss said. So, they ordered a picture from the same catalogue as the copier-paper. I’m all for motivating people, but please – if you chuck anything in the office shredder today, make it an A2 print of a sunset with some sentimental shit printed under it.